By Pete Grossman
In an exclusive interview today with INS, (Infauxtainment News Service) Mel Gibson, the Braveheat Beast, the Charismatic Caballero, the Ubermensch of Malibu, admitted that he’s the one who doctored the insidiously incendiary answering machine messages of conversations between he and his former lover, Oksana Grigorieva, the mother of his latest spawn.
“Look,” Gibson told [...]

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By George Held
Cuyahoga Falls, OH. (INS) Stung by the recent loss of its most famous citizens, the city of Cleveland is seeking to follow suit, leaving Ohio bereft of its second largest metropolis. The Municipal Council has appointed a delegation to negotiate with Sun Belt states to cut a deal to move this Rust Belt [...]

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By George Held
Winesburg, OH. (INS) – ESPN has announced that LeBron James, the most famous American since Michael Jackson, will hold a prime-time press conference on Thursday, July 8. At that time, most of his 100 million FaceBook friends assume, he will announce which NBA team he will graciously allow to sign him to a [...]

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By Giuseppe Cinzano
Washington, D.C. (INS) – After her resignation as a columnist for the Hearst newspaper group following her now infamous call for Israel to “Get the hell out of Palestine,” 89 year-old Helen Thomas, the former dean of the White House Press Corps, admits an obsession caused her downfall and that she wants her [...]

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By Pete Grossman
Chicago, IL (INS). The Society of Long Objectionable Waiting (SLOW) has recently released it’s time passage evaluations:
Union Minutes: These units have a lot of elasticity. While union minutes can be on the money – such as when to punch out, generally, they can be pretty darn dormant. For instance, if you’re setting a [...]

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By George Held
PALO ALTO (INS) – The National Organization of Teachers (NOT) announced today that its members have voted to outsource grading to Numbers Union of Mumbai (NUMB), India, in order to take the pressure from their students’ parents off America’s high-school teachers.
Since grades for the college-bound became the ultimate measure of high-school success, [...]

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By Eric Kenning
ROME (INS). Facing spiraling budget deficits, plummeting poll numbers, and stalled careers, California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and Pope Benedict XVI have agreed to exchange positions, according to Monsignor Linguini Marinara, a high-level Vatican custodian. He added, while scouring the pope’s private toilet, that the Austrian-born governor and the Bavarian-born pope would meet [...]

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By George Held
Mountain View, CA (INS). Now that President Obama has virtually endorsed the public outburst by calling Kanye West a “jackass,” Oogle, the leader in social networking, has announced the creation of Outburst.com, which will debut next Monday, September 21st. Myron Bender, CEO of Oogle, expects record traffic on the site: “In the wake [...]

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By Pete Grossman
Greetings! Thanks to you Infauxtainment enjoys it’s 100th posting today! Catch up, check out or dive into all the fun stuff this crazy satire site brings you. Nobody’s safe! Subjects include new products like Jewcosamine, Meeto, Taser 4 Kids, Infauxtwitter and Twitter’s competition,“It!” Catch TV shows like the Latin version of Entourage: [...]

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By Pete Grossman
Ground Sprout, ID (INS) Air Apparent, the company specializing in personal gas has announced the release of their new product “Meeto,” a supplement one ingests to curb farting during office meetings.
Ace Brown, VP, Public Relations for Air Apparent says “We modeled our product after Beano, the supplement that curbs farting for all occasions, [...]

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